Speed is relative

It took years of hard work, training six days a week and spending an hour in the gym every day, for Usain Bolt to run 100 meters in 9.58 seconds. It took me a little under a two minutes to just take my time and walk 100 meters. I think I win.

Autopilot

If the aircraft is on autopilot, it makes no difference who sits in the pilot's seat... as long as they don't touch anything... and know how to conduct an emergency landing.

Eleventh Hour Conspiracy

Disappointed by the lack of impact of the Millennium Bug, computers now conspire to self destruct when they sense the urgency of the eleventh hour.

ṫake ṫhaṫ!

Someṫīmes I feel līke doṫṫīng my ṫ’s and crossīng my ī’s jusṫ ṫo be rebellīous.

Fruit for thought

Even a healthy tree, planted by a stream, still only bears fruit in season.

The squeaky wheel

Once the squeaky wheel has been oiled, if it continues to squeak, it may need to be adjusted or even replaced. No amount of oil can fix an unbalanced wheel.

Advice

Speak carefully when giving advice lest somebody follow it.

Quality Quotes

"A quote that supports your perspective is useful. A quote that challenges your perspective is powerful. A quote that changes your perspective is paramount." ~Chris Summertime

Highly sophisticated Australian colloquialisms

Propel an additional decapod crustacean upon the al fresco cooking apparatus.
Lapidate the genus corvus!

Big ideas

Big ideas are like hot air balloons. The bigger they are and the more hot air they contain, the harder they are to reach. Both need to be grounded before you can climb aboard.

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